Alan Partridge Quotes: I'm Alan Partridge

20/05/2011

Some classic Partidge quotes...

"We have a caller on the line who fears he may be a gay, he's married so we'll only refer to him by his christian name. This is Domingo from Little Oakley."

"Yeah, can I just read you something from Top Gear magazine? No, it’s alright, I’ve got it here, I’ve got it here. [Opens the magazine on the bed and reads] 'With a mere ninety break-horse-power available, progress is too leisurely to be called fast, but on the motorway in fifth gear the Megane’s slow pace really becomes a pain. Uphill runs become power-sappingly mundane, while overtaking National Express coaches can become a long, drawn-out affair.' Not my words, Carol, the words of Top Gear magazine. "

"Lynn's not my wife. She's my PA. Hard-worker, but there's no affection."

"That was 'Big yellow taxi' by Joni Mitchell, a song in which Joni complains they "Paved paradise to put up a parking lot", a measure which actually would have alleviated traffic congestion on the outskirts of paradise, something which Joni singularly fails to point out, perhaps because it doesn’t quite fit in with her blinkered view of the world. Nevertheless, nice song."

"Jurassic Park!"

"Do you want me to lapdance for you?" ... "uh-uh I want a second series!"

Alan proposing a possible programme idea into his personal tape recorder: "Jet from Gladiators to host a millennium barn dance at Yeovil aerodrome. Properly policed. It must not, I repeat not, turn into an all-night rave."

Alan addressing the widow of a recently deceased 40 year old: "All those people who go around saying “Life begins at forty”. They're notable by their absence. The nerve."

"Monkey Tennis!"

"Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan! Oh, he's not seeing me, I'll get him later. ... Dan!"

Alan Partidge Quotes from Funny-haha.co.uk

 

The Alan Partridge Complete Box Set [DVD]

The Alan Partridge Complete Box Set [DVD]This dvd box-set contains every episode broadcast, from Knowing Me, Knowing you (extended versions), to the Xmas special and two series of I'm Alan Partridge. Also included are Alan's Country Ramble, the Comic Relief segments he did, a never broadcast pilot episode, numerous adverts for Knowing Me, Knowing You ("Ignore the critics, this programme is actually quite good"), deleted and extended scenes. There's other stuff on there too, you can never have too much of the Partridge, so get this collection of one of the best comedy characters ever.